Claim Your Cooler!
Californians have been voting blue for years and at some point you just have to ask yourself, “Why?” Our intrepid man on the street interviewed Californians from all over the state to get to the truth — and their answers may surprise you! Here’s why Californians say they keep voting for Democrats: “My taxes are just too low.” Struggling with low taxes? Don’t give your money to the government. Subscribe to The Bee instead! “My life is miserable, and I want others to suffer as I do.” “I died 57 years ago.” “Que?” “I’m curious just how expensive gas can get.” “The crackhead sleeping on the corner gets me a great deal on fentanyl.” “We already sunk $126 billion into the high-speed rail project. We can’t stop now.” “Democrats have done a fantastic job running California. What do you mean?” “The form of the destructor has been chosen.” “أصوّت للحزب الديمقراطي لأنهم يدعمون المهاجرين أمثالي.” “They gave me a dollar to vote blue down the line. I bought myself a bag of chips.” “The wildfires are always so romantic. Mmm, yes. Indubitably.” “Get out of my hobo tent!” “I might want to kill someone someday. I’d hate to go to jail for that.” “Boo! I’m a ghost! OooooOOOooooOOOoooo!” As it turns out, there’s a lot of reasons people vote blue in The Golden State. Are any of them good reasons? Let us know what you think in the comments. Help The Bee keep doing hard-hitting journalism. Subscribe today! You’re currently a free subscriber to The Babylon Bee. Please help us keep bringing light and laughter by becoming a paid subscriber.
© 2026 The Babylon Bee |
|